Coming out of hiding!

It's been a while hasn't it? The last 5 months have been quite a roller coaster but I think we're on a pretty even path now. No doubt there will be another major dip around the corner, but for now I'm going to enjoy what I have. Over my weeks of absence, I had moments where I thought I really was drowning, but the clouds have lifted and spring is in the air and with it the smell of hope, joy and life. Compared to this time last year my life is infinitely easier and as a family I think we are all happier.

I'm not usually one for list but I thought I'd just wrote down a few of the issues that contributed to my absence! They're in no particular order, just as I remember them.

Renal colic - at least this bout didn't require 3 days in patient management. I was mortified at having to call an ambulance but I couldn't have taken my husband and the two children (unfed!) to hospital at 730 in the morning. The ambulance crew were not impressed when they saw how we had to secure the door behind them - a dead lock, chain and 2 stair gates were seen to be putting them in potential danger as they wouldn't have been able to escape easily. I had to point out that if it were not for these measures, our son would be well known to the local police and possibly the ambulance crews....

Infected blisters (severe enough to develop into an abscess which required draining and a course of antibiotices) caused by ill fitting shoes - sorry Clarks but I won't be using your shoe fitting service again. Luckily there is a fantastic service run by Footling where a qualified fitter comes to your home and measures your child's feet. I will never take James to a shoe shop again!

Severe crush injury to Bea's fingertip - sustained on the day that my husband was rushed to hospital (see above). So having told him we couldn't possibly accompany him, we ended up having a jaunt to the A&E department anyway. Luckily it wasn't fractured, although it has taken a LONG time to heal. I expect a call from social services any day now as Bea has had so many A&E attendances over the last 6 months. It is both a reflection of the fact that she is a second child and that we are often preoccupied with keeping James out of danger that she attempts rather brave and foolhardy stunts.

Full time school starting - although, to be honest for the first term James didn't make it through a full week as he caught so many coughs, colds and infections that he was either sent home or kept home at least one day a week before Christmas. The school is amazing - James is so happy there and is making so much progress it makes my heart leap with pride. To think that we were beginning to think we would never hear him talk again when his regression was at its worst.

My return to work - it's not been without hiccups and difficulties, but I am starting to get used to being at work one day a week. More about work another time though.

Christmas - the most stressful, difficult and downright miserable time of year for us. I find the whole thing just gut wrenchingly awful, as if someone is taking my soul from me every day for weeks. There seems to be no end to the festivities and wishes of a happy and peaceful Christmas, and few people truly understand why I find it so difficult. Next year I'm planning to build a den and hibernate. I'll go in in November and come out mid January.

I think that those are the major things. But as I say, things are brighter and better now, and I feel we're coming out of the fog. I hope I'll be around a bit more now.

Breaking news!

It's been a difficult week here - James is at home every day as his school had been unable to recruit a new teacher for his classroom. I've gone from him being at playscheme 3 days a week or more, to him at home full time and was already feeling the burnout hitting me. To add to my woes, over the weekend I developed labyrinthitis/vestibular neuritis and have been confined to my bed - I can just about sit up to read things on the computer and was able to do a bit of knitting this afternoon, but I have mainly been sleeping. Luckily, my husband was able to work from home today and the children had their first settling in day with the childminder (in the hope that I'll be going to work soon - but that's a completely different thread).

Just after 5 o'clock I got a phone call from the Local Education Authority to inform me that the school have been able to recruit a teacher! Very last minute (there can't be that many teachers who are out of work in September!) but excellent news for everyone. There will be a three week induction period during which time the children won't be there, but at least he'll be at school before half term! I can't believe it - we were prepared for him to be off school until November or even all term so this is amazing.

I'm over the moon, although my emotions are a bit labile at the moment, and I'm suddenly thinking is my wee boy ready for big school already? How the last 5 years have flown by - to think that 5 years ago I was heavily pregnant, anticipating the arrival of our first born and planning my shopping! I had fallen hook, line and sinker for all the media pressure to have the best pram, the perfect cot, the cosiest floor rug and was buying into the "lifestyle" of being a parent. Had I known what I know now, I would have saved most of my pennies. If I were to do it all again, from scratch, I would buy about 3 things - a good quality sling, an Amby hammock and a supply of Tots Bots nappies and Weenotions wraps. Oh and a supply of yarn from Cafe Knit so I could knit up lots of lovely hand knitted garments. As we often say in medicine, the retrospectoscope is a wonderful invention....

Here I am five years on, two children under my belt and James is about to start school. OK, not the school we would have expected him to go to (my husband bought a copy of "The Good School's Guide" almost as soon as he was born) but then how many of us truly walk the path we'd planned throughout our lives? The most important thing is that it is right school for him, where he can make progress and thrive. I can only hope that this happens for him and for us.